After the last post, I mustered courage to follow more blogs. Click on my profile to see which. Anyway, Eleanor Roscuro has followed me! I have TWO followers now! Twice as many as before! As many as before plus 1! And minus 0! 1 plus 1 minus 0 plus 1 minus 1! That makes 2! Unlike math, new followers bring me exhilaration. Thank you, Eleanor!
To give this post more of a reason to exist, I present my results from I Write Like. I Write Like has been popular for a while now. It's where you enter a piece of your writing and the site analyzes it and tells you what famous writer you write like. I entered my blog posts, and this is what I got:
Cory Doctorow, Cory Doctorow, H. P. Lovecraft, Ray Bradbury, David Foster Wallace, H. P. Lovecraft, Cory Doctorow, Cory Doctorow, Cory Doctorow, Cory Doctorow, David Foster Wallace, H. P. Lovecraft, Cory Doctorow, Stephen King, Isaac Asimov (for that post on swearing), Cory Doctorow, Cory Doctorow, Margaret Mitchell (for the first post on the Palins), H. P. Lovecraft, Dan Brown, Vladimir Nabokov, Cory Doctorow, Cory Doctorow, Cory Doctorow, Mary Shelley, Douglas Adams – (for the second half of the post on computer vs. pencil animation), Stephen King, William Gibson, Cory Doctorow, James Joyce, Cory Doctorow
If you skimmed or skipped that paragraph, I completely understand. (Yes, I had a lot of time on my hands that day.) Mostly, you should notice that I got "Cory Doctorow." A lot. I'd never heard of him before, but the next day, I noticed a book in B&N with a familiar name on the cover: Cory Doctorow. The book was "Little Brother," and it looked interesting. Maybe I'll check it out, see if I really do write like him.
I also entered text from a story I'm writing ("writing" here meaning "neglecting with half a chance of ever finishing"). This is what I got when I entered short excerpts:
Stephen King, Stephen King, Raymond Chandler, Raymond Chandler, Stephen King, Stephen King, Stephen King
I didn't realize my story was that scary...
This is what I got when I entered 3 entire chapters:
J. K. Rowling
I am gonna be an EPIC bestseller! Right? Right?
Right?
It's ok. You don't have to break it to me. I realize even if I entered gibberish into IWL, I could garner comparisons with famous, bestselling writers like Dan Brown,
Stephen King, David Foster Wallace, and James Joyce. I know because I actually entered gibberish into IWL and garnered comparisons with those famous, bestselling authors. (Were they actually bestsellers? I don't know.) Don't expect me to remember the precise wording, but I entered text to the effect of, "ahdk a kdhoeiw aj dja id bhehwa d oaiuek,a dhbeal." And that was just ONE line. Brilliant, I know. My insight probably changed your perception of reality. That line alone could inspire more movie scripts than any two current bestsellers put TOGETHER. Yes, TOGETHER. Right? Right?
Right?
Just joking. I also created and entered this text: "That our webs would lead to rain and faraway scallops to the downy bed of rose petals. For in that scarlet lethal box what pyres set by must scrawl away abysmal." By now, I bet you're annoyed of my insight changing your perception of reality.
Kidding. I was just trying to write glittery babble structured like Shakespeare's words, "To sleep, perchance to dream. Aye, there's the rub. For in the sleep of death what dreams may come when we have shuffled off this mortal coil must give us pause." I was hoping my babble would garner a comparison with Shakespeare, proving that Shakespeare is no better than babble. I don't think highly of Shakespeare. Most people assume that means I'm an uneducated baboon (even if THEY have never read Shakespeare - hypocrites). I'm not. I'm way ahead of my time, is all. It's not that I don't understand Shakespeare. I do. Let me read a Shakespeare passage once, maybe twice. I understand it fast. Well, not that fast, since I'm a slow, careful reader to begin with, but I DO get Shakespeare. I just don't get why it's so great.
People say the language is beautiful. It's alright, sure, but truly beautiful writing is clear and understandable, which, hello! Shakespeare's not. Not to most people. Besides, beauty means nothing without substance. Who cares HOW Shakespeare says anything if the content is repulsive? (Well, apparently, the whole world, but forget that.) Shakespeare filled stories with ridiculous, stupid, cruel, manipulative, evil, or wholly insane characters who are often rewarded for their immorality and sympathized with for their stupidity. Just to mention the character element. The proof is in the pudding, and Shakespeare pudding tastes more like Medieval mud (not that I know what that tastes like). Why? WHY is Shakespeare a classic? I just don't get it.
Ok, so I haven't read that much Shakespeare. I haven't read all his plays. I haven't read a single play all the way through.
Oh, dear. My argument sounds less and less convincing, darn it. But I've read enough excerpts from a wide enough variety of Shakespeare to know that I can understand it very well and it isn't that beautiful. I've seen enough movies and TV shows and read enough summaries to know the stories. The stories are what counts. The stories are awful.
Anyway, IWL didn't give me "Shakespeare" for my aforementioned babble. It gave me "James Joyce," and I don't know who that is. I would have tried again for "Shakespeare," but I lost interest.
Moving on, I present a glorious Rapunzel (Tangled) poster. I love the expressions on their faces. They look like intense, swashbuckling adventurers. With lots of hair and gorgeous colors. =D
James Joyce is arguably the best writer of the twentieth century. His most famous book, Ulysses, is about a man called Leopold Bloom and a day in his life.
ReplyDeleteJust if you were wondering...
Thank you, Eleanor. =) I had heard of him before, but someone implied his work was freaky, so I never looked into it. Maybe I should look him up though.
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